Crossing Swords Season 2
Goodhearted hero wannabe Patrick lands his dream job as a squire, only to learn the royal castle is a corrupt hornet’s nest of horny monarchs, crooks and charlatans. War, murder, full frontal nudity—who knew brightly colored peg people led such exciting lives?
Episodes
E1Patrick finds himself on trial for betraying the kingdom, and only avoids punishment with a Hail Mary promise to the king: that he will find the legendary leprechaun gold. Patrick is thrilled when he enlists a real…
E2A drug epidemic at Blossom’s all-girls academy threatens to derail the king and queen’s scheme to draw attention to their newfound wealth. Patrick and Broth go undercover as female students to protect Blossom and bust…
E3The wedding of the year brings Merriman a chance to mend fences with King Rami IV, whose son is arranged to marry Holden the squire. But when Ruben crashes the wedding in order to win Holden back, Patrick uncovers a…
E4When Queen Tulip slips into a sex-toy-induced coma, King Merriman throws a beauty pageant to replace her. Patrick feels guilty because he recruited the sex toy’s inventor. While every eligible lady in town tries to win…
E5On an island training retreat, Patrick and the squires meet the most famous knight in the kingdom, but Patrick quickly decides the knight’s lessons are superficial crap. Elsewhere on the island, Merriman and Tulip…
E6The circus returns to the kingdom, much to the king’s delight. Blarney is reunited with his uppity clown college classmates. Patrick, however, is concerned that Danielle’s circus origins make this an opportune time for…
E7The kingdom adjusts to life under its new (old) king, the Old King, who is back on the throne thanks to Danielle’s machinations. Patrick is torn between loyalty to the kingdom and loyalty to his former king, Merriman…
E8As punishment for his refusal to turn in King Merriman, Patrick finds himself sentenced to fight in the arena as a gladiator. Merriman starts to take a shine to his new life in the human resources department of a…
E9Merriman and Tulip are back just in time for the annual Hallowtide party. Patrick is tasked with chaperoning Princess Blossom but abandons his duties to hang out with the knights. Blossom swaps places with her deceased…
E10After months of the kingdom depleting the jewel mines underground, the Mole People finally lash out at the surface-dwellers who have ruined their home. With the royal family in danger, Patrick must journey down into the…